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Feeling Guilty When I Shouldn't

11/3/2018

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When we received Savannah’s diagnosis of Down Syndrome, I felt that I failed. I felt I disappointed JR by not giving him “a perfect child”. Just as one doesn’t know how amazing motherhood is before they have children or how amazing it is to be a grandparent before having grandchildren, I didn’t know the amazing love God would show us through having a child with Down Syndrome. I didn’t know the beautifully unique bond that would be given to JR and I. I didn’t know the tremendous excitement that continues to come with every victory and milestone Savannah accomplishes.  So many negative connotations associated with DS is why I advocate and openly share our journey. My ignorance and listening to the negative discussions from the medical community placed an unnecessary guilt and fear in me as a wife, mother, and lady. There is nothing a lady should feel guilty about when their child is given a diagnosis of DS. There is nothing a parent does to cause an extra copy of the 21st chromosome. Why feel guilty about something so beautiful?
There is a 1 in 700 CHANCE of having a child with DS. That means we hit the chromosome jackpot! Instead of feeling guilty, I say to a mom or dad that has just received a diagnosis of DS for their child, CONGRATULATIONS! With any child there will be obstacles and sleepless nights. There will be times romance as a couple takes a back seat. However, there is personal growth and wisdom gained in having a differently abled child. I have learned more how to see others as individuals, not by how they look or act. I also look at other parents with more respect and admiration, never pity.  There is also a bond between a couple that is unlike any other. The love we have for one another is amplified by watching our lives come to life! .... All because there is “a little something extra” involved! .
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    I write about life and family. My heart's desire is to educate as I am being educated, while inspiring and encouraging others through the beauty of Down Syndrome.

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