Joy

Joy

It’s 6am and the first official day of Thanksgiving Break for my children. All three girls are sleeping. My husband has already left for work. As I walk through our living room that is dimly lit from the Christmas lights, my heart is full and I have joy.
I am not without heartache or difficult times. Unfortunately, my husband and I have experienced what other parents have after a prenatal diagnosis of DS, which is extreme pressure to terminate our baby. We also experienced the heartache and extreme trust and faith of handing our baby to a stranger to have open heart surgery.
15 days from today it will be a year that my sweet momma went to be with The Lord and I miscarried. (Within 24 hours of one another). Four months later, my job position was eliminated.
Joy is something that one can have no matter the circumstance.
Joy isn’t based on circumstances, unlike happiness. Happiness is an emotion that is circumstantial.
I have joy because God is good ALL the time. What we may see as tragedy is actually a bigger picture transpiring. You see, God makes no mistakes. Savannah is Savannah, not a diagnosis. Her purpose and one of my purposes through her, is to enlighten others of the beauty in diversity and triumphs over obstacles. She is thriving after her open heart surgery and she has a testimony of how The Great Physician uses the hands of others.
The passing of my momma comes with joy because I know she is with her Lord and knows no pain or physical issues associated with Diabetes. She even had the privilege of holding our unborn child before we did.
Joy also comes with the peace of knowing God has a bigger plan. The job position that was eliminated gave me the privilege of being a full time stay at home mom. That has always been my hearts’ desire.
So, as I sip my coffee in the quiet, dimly lit house, I have joy. I have a full, thankful heart even in the midst of grief, rejection, or any natural emotion from what life presents....because God is truly good all the time.